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The Noo Old Labour Chancellor

14 Oct

Alan Johnson has been appointed Labour Shadow Chancellor, in other words Finance Minster. This is – as Sir Humphrey would have said – a bold, even courageous decision, given that Mr Johnson has no expertise or experience in this field.

Still, as Labour have almost never had anyone in that category (having a clue about finance and economics) I suppose from their point of view AJ is as good as anyone.

The key requirement in a Labour Chancellor is of course:

A) to blather on endlessly and bore us all to death and especially build up a house-built-on-sand impression that you have the faintest idea what you are talking about.

B) to complicate the tax system so completely that it breaks down totally (see just ONE example of Inland Revenue shambles)

C) to completely separate what you do from what actually needs doing and to achieve the exact opposite of what you set out to (see Brown’s achievements on child poverty)

D) to give your supporters in the civil service and local councils (especially the top brass, not the plebs) enormous financial advantages and vast pensions at the expense of the country as a whole

E) to leave your post with the country in debt up to the eyeballs blaming it all on “the recession” that you have yourself done a lot to provoke by overspending

So, where Gordon Brown led no doubt AJ will follow. We can only hope that the choice of a Labour Shadow Chancellor will remain of unsurpassing irrelevance insofar as they will never get relected or at least until all Labour MPs in any way responsible for the last disgraceful government have been put out to – no doubt very expensive – grass.

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Posted by on October 14, 2010 in Humour, Politics

 

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